Narc Accomodator Recovery & Set backs

Ok, my sibling has agreed to let me speak alone. I’ve received criticism for ‘seeing’ NPD every where. Fair enough; seek and ye shall find. If all you look for is XYZ, then that is all you will find.

I began speaking about NPD,- very hesitantly- in some forums, because I really do enjoy that board and didn’t want to step on toes. However, I finally realized that some self defense/coping skills had kicked in, as well- that if someone is mad at you for what you said, you don’t deserve to speak any more.

Narc Accomodators and Survivors learn that we do NOT have the same rights as everyone else; we are, at best, second class citizens. We spend our lives in conflict of angrily fighting ‘injustice and double standard’ that we are worthy and have rights, but then acquiescing to that unworthiness within the confines of our personal relationships with narcs.

The Road of Recovery for a Narcissist Accomodator/Survivor is an ongoing challenge. This is no different than any other Recovery; we have set backs and the return of old behaviors or old conditioned responses. All we can do is to study what happened to understand the responses and find better ways of ‘coping and responding’ in the future.

How do I know the Coffee Party Movement is the Carefully Created Universe of Narcs? Because of my conditioned, instinctive response to their Founder’s speech.

I was furious. That self centered, ignorant, spoiled brat! Doesn’t she see that those folks she wants to ‘get out of the way’ are AMERICANS?! Is she trying to say that HER PEOPLE are MORE EQUAL than those Americans she wants out of the way?! Doesn’t she understand that what She and Her people want, could hurt millions of folks, and that is what the Obstructionists are fighting?! Congress stop fighting and get to work!? Is she stupid?! Has she not read any American history?! Congress Fighting Over the Issues is the backbone of how they work; and they’ve done that from the first meeting in 1776!

The next morning, it was staring me in the face: If you are tempted to call an adult infantile or a spoiled brat.... you’ve been narced. My instinctive-conditioned response was my internal conflict of being devalued by a narc, and her manipulations and machinations were so subtle and clever,.... that even I didn’t see the devious nature... at first.

If you do fall victim to a narc, don't feel stupid. They are very, very, very, good at their manipulations and machinations. Even survivors get 'decieved' by some of them.