Demolish, Deny

In arguments, they use Deflection to avoid responsibility and then point out the Normal’s mistakes as being much more heinous. Normals are willing to take responsibility for their contributions to a conflict, and Narcs know how to use this in their own favor.

I n the long run, this Demolishes a Normal’s self esteem, because they begin to believe the Narc. Abusive Relationships are built on this subtle, but constant Diminishing and Deflating of a Normal’s accomplishments and even their worth on the planet.

When pushed into a corner, Narcs will use every single weakness, insecurity and even physical handicaps as fair game for their Demolition of their opponent. Even the strongest individual will be worn down by a Narc, because they are relentless, and never never never apologize or recognize their actions as contributing to the problem.

Their tenacity in Denying their mistakes, will cause Normals to doubt their sanity, their memory, and their own self worth.

Even when packing up their belongings for getting fired- due to insubordination or stealing company supplies; or going to jail for spousal battery; or loading up the car after a divorce: they will not apologize, because it is always someone else’s fault.

These actions should sound familiar; they are the tactics employed by Abusive People to exact complete control over their victims. We cannot say that All Abusers are Narcs, but most Narcs are abusive.

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