Wednesday, April 1, 2009

4. Require Excessive Admiration

4. Requirs excessive admiration.
Excessive in two ways:
They want praise, compliments, and expressions of envy all the time.
And and they want to be told that everything they do is better than what others can do.

Sincerity is not important; quantity is better than quality.

Some of the narcs we know play the Martyr Card when they need validation and love.

Some Narcs constantly point out all their little successes, in hopes of getting more praise for simple things like taking out the garbage.

When they are being polite, Narcs will fish for compliments. When they are being manipulative, they will tell elaborate stories of how they saved the day; or how their work is so much better, but the boss doesn’t appreciate them.

The problem arises when it comes time to reciprocate.

Narcs don’t reciprocate congratulations for anyone else, because that diminishes their achievements.

Instead of offering congratulations on someone else’s achievement, they dismiss or diminish the accomplishment with their personal disdain or questioning the worth of the accomplishment.

Another tactic is to maneuver themselves into the arena of congratulations by acting like they were/are a major part of the effort; OR that they have a great deal of knowledge about some esoteric, abstract connection to the project that garnered the award.

Normal: I heard that you son won the Science Fair with his Electro-Magnetic Field detector.
Narc: Oh, yes, I helped him to see that numerous fields are now using EMF detectors; even paranormal investigators. The theories are..... 10 minutes later the Normal is hoping a cartoon Anvil will drop on his head and save him from this torture.

Only when Narcs are in the company of a boss or supervisor, will they ‘join’ the crowd in praising someone else’s accomplishments. The only time they will join in the praise, is when it will make them look bad for not participating. The praise is not genuine and at the very first opportunity; they will demolish the success in private conversations.

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