6. Selfishly Uses Others

6. Selfishly takes advantage of others to achieve his own ends- Translation: Narcissists use other people to get what they want without caring about the cost to the other people.

We know of a Narc Boss who used business funds and resources for personal needs/wants/gains, and then carefully orchestrated their departure- before they could be held accountable.

The physical and conscious deceptions that Con Artists employ are the same things that Narcs use intuitively to survive in their Universe and maintain their imagined stature. Narcs are the best con artists on the planet, since they can even ‘con’ themselves into believing their own lies.

Dr. Bernstien discusses how Narcs don’t have the inner strength to handle their own negative emotions, and will manipulate others around them, to cope. If a Narc feels anger, they will tell others of their perceived injustice and get everyone around them angry, so they don’t have to suffer the emotional and actual consequences of releasing that anger.

Poking the Bear is a type of hypnotizing. The Narc needs some emotional response, so they ‘poke any bear’ in the vicinity. The continue to poke and poke and poke until that bear lashes out, usually at the Narc, and thus the Narc gets that release of anger. The Poor Bear wasn’t angry, and had no reason to explode. The Narc manipulated the Bear into doing something he had no intentions or motivations to do.

Similarly, Narc's know that the standard reaction to an onslaught, so they create a situation where the Narc is treated horribly, just to ensure someone else will feel pity for them. They quietly or subtly taunt a normal, until the perfect moment when the Narc pushes them over the edge- always in a public venue- and the Normal explodes. Since no one knows the private torture that led up to the explosion, they run to the defense if the Narc. Their manipulations are so skillful that despite the Narc being the instigator, the Narc appears to be the victim, thus causing the real victim to suffer the consequences.

Skillful Narcs can play the Martyr Card and the Normals around them don’t realize there is no reason to be fawning all over the Narc; their struggles are no worse that everyone else’s, but Narcs know exactly what to say to illicit a higher level of empathy from the Normals around them.

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